Professor, father, husband, writer....& all around pain in the ass, Ryan Jones is a rarity among sportswriters: You actually manage to enjoy his work in spite of his snarkiness. As a source of knowledge on topics as broad as basketball, hip hop, netball and Joe Paterno's bathing suit preference , Ryan is one of our favorite writers and a friend to our blog world. The former Editor in Chief of SLAM Magazine and working teacher at Penn State University, he is a source of hilarious content both on the SLAM site and in other media, Ryan is in a class all by his lonesome. Some would say it's by design, others would say it's because of his farming roots, but for us, it is a pleasure to have the man, the semi-myth and the quasi-legend grace us with some insight into his world.
Mr. Jones, take it away.
SKO: Chuck Klosterman, our maiden interviewee, says that "the people who write about sports despise the subject they write about". How fully does that apply to you?
RJ: As someone who A) enjoys Chuck's writing and B) drank lots of Miller High Life while watching the 2006 Orange Bowl from the comfort of his couch, I must respectfully disagree. (Those things have nothing to do with each other, or with your question, but you seem to want me to name drop, so there you go.) I'm not sure, but I THINK Chuck was referring more to beat writers, the guys who cover a team 8 days a week for 9 months and probably DO end up hating everyone and everything related to that sport and that team when the season's over. From my brief time in newspapers pre-Slam, and from knowing a lot of beat writers while I was at Slam, I can certainly co-sign on the number of miserable cats who do THAT job for a living. It's the relentless nature of the schedule and having to deal with the same people every day for so long, particularly when those people are often uncooperative at best.
That said... the beauty of how we did/do things at Slam is that it had almost the opposite effect. While I was usually sort of burned out on the day-to-day NBA grind by the end of any given season, I never came to hate the sport. If anything, being at Slam made me more of a hoop fan than I ever was. Let me be clear: I was always a big basketball fan, but until I got to college, my love of the "game" was overly reliant on my love of the Los Angeles Lakers. Then I went to a Big Ten school and had front-row seats for Bobby Knight, the Fab Five, Mike Finley, Big Dog, Shawn Respert and, um, John Amaechi. That, and the Lakers falling off a bit in the early-mid '90s, made me more of a BASKETBALL fan. Then I started at Slam in the fall of '99, and my immersion in the game went next-level.
So, Klosterman doesn't know what he's talking about — although his latest Esquire column (August or September issue) is one of his best yet. His first novel is out this month, too, I think. Not that he needs my help selling books... Ok, back to me now!
SKO: Lebron James is transcendent at the game of basketball as is your distinct writing style, and you have a well defined connection to him. Do you think Mr. James can focus his energies to the game he gets payed to play as stringently as he does the rest of his money making ventures and if he does where can he wind up in the pantheons of NBA history, in your opinion?
RJ: 1, LeBron... should I know that name?
2, Did Myles put you up to this question?
Anyway... It's pretty impossible for me not to sound defensive or jock-riding on this or any question that is critical of LeBron. But you guys are paying me a lot of money to do this, so I'll give it a shot.
Rule No. 1 of successful debating is (I think), Present your opponent's argument first, then refute it. So: You're absolutely right to imply (as I think you're implying) that LeBron still isn't getting everything out of his game. There are absolutely still times where he seems to... not DISAPPEAR, really, but settle for jumpers or fail to demand the ball when you know he's the only guy on the court who can do what needs done at a particular moment. It's frustrating to watch, particularly for someone like me. I've had conversations with his old high school coach about this, and he sees it and absolutely agrees — sometimes you just want to scream on the dude and say "Take this sh*t over!"
That said... I disagree with almost everything else your question implies:
1, My writing style is not that distinct. Or distinctive.
2, It's worth noting that LeBron makes a LOT more money through endorsements than the does actually playing basketball. That said, I've never really been down with the whole "he'd be a better player if he didn't worry so much about off-court distractions" argument. I didn't buy it with Shaq, and I don't buy it with LeBron. I've watched him work out. I've heard too many coaches talk about him leading through example and hard work. I just don't think it's an issue.
To me, the flaws in LeBron's game are inseparable from the things that make him great. What has ALREADY made him transcendent is his selflessness — yeah, he's got two-guard skills in a PF body, but far more important, he's got the mind and eyes and heart of a point guard. I'm honestly not trying to make excuses here, but I really think this explains him: dude CAN take over most games, but he'd rather get everybody going, dime his mediocre teammates into respectability, etc and so forth. That he's willing and able to do this is so much of what makes him great; that it often means not using all of his physical gifts to just run sh*t himself is what leaves us wanting more.
I blame some of this on coaching and some of it on the quality of teammates he's had since entering the League, but of course it ultimately falls on him. LeBron can (and must) continue to improve, and that fact that he's still got room to do so is frightening — in a good way. As it is, right now, he's f*cking amazing, arguably the best player in the game, and he WILL get better, as he has every year so far. Pardon the broken record or skipping iPod or whatever, but he's STILL just 23.
And with that, to your ultimate question: I think he's on pace for top-10 all-time. Whether he's top 5, or maybe even in the GOAT argument, will depend on how many (if any) chips he stacks. I'm optimistic.
SKO: What, in your opinion, are the major flaws of the American high school basketball system?
RJ: Can I sound arrogant and judgmental for a minute — or at least, more arrogant and judgmental than usual? To me, the problems with high school basketball are reflective of the problems in larger society. People are greedy and short-sighted and selfish, all things that society tends to reward (short-term, at least) and encourage. I guess I could try to break this down a little more, talk about the AAU system and the sneaker companies and the NCAA, but... sorry, this election season has me feeling particularly misanthropic. Plus, David Foster Wallace just killed himself. So my fallback answer to everything is "People suck."
I don't think high school basketball is any more screwed up than anything else, is my point.
SKO: If you were named NCAA commissioner for one day, what are the top three things you would change?
RJ: 1, Disband the NCAA. Do I really need two more?
The problem with the NCAA is that its hypocrisy is sort of too deep to even fathom — as a governing body, it only has power because the universities it governs ALLOW it to have power, and the universities grant that authority because it (the NCAA) makes them money. So, I'm not sure how to really solve the big-picture issue, because you'd have to tear up the very foundation of college athletics, and there's a lot of coin weighing that foundation down. (Sh*t is HEAVY). In lieu of that, I guess I'd try the following:
1, Appoint a board of student-athletes to go over every single rule in the NCAA book and ask this question of each one: "Does this rule ultimately exist to benefit student-athletes?" If the answer isn't a definitive, absolute "Yes," that rule is off the books.
2, I'm not fan of out-and-out "paying" student athletes, but there is middle ground between amateurism and professionalism that the NCAA is too stupid to consider, but should. Varsity athletes in pretty much any sport — and this goes well beyond big-time D1 football or hoops — obviously don't have time to work in-season, and for most kids, the "season" these days is pretty much year round. Plus, if they DO get a summer job or something, they face scrutiny about getting hooked up by a booster. Beyond that, there's the simple reality that a lot of these kids come to college from NOTHING. I know of a ballplayer here at Penn State who is one of four or five kids, dad's out of the picture, older brother's in jail, the whole sad cliche. He had to bum rides to get home to visit his mom over the summer. There are thousands of kids like this in schools around the country, every year.
The obvious solution, to me, is some sort of stipend or allowance system, by which kids get something — $100 a week, $300 a month, $1000 a semester, whatever — just to have some money in their pocket. Maybe they have to qualify, like they would for financial aid; maybe they pay it back only if they make a certain amount of money after graduation, or maybe they don't pay it back at all. Whatever — the NCAA could absolutely afford it (anybody see how much CBS pays for the Tournament?) and it solves or at least cuts down on a lot of potential problems: Poor kids would be less likely to be tempted by street agents or runners or boosters, and coaches wouldn't have to think about risking the NCAA's wrath for giving a kid bus fare to go see his mother during his very brief summer vacation.
3, Disband the NCAA. Unless I already said that...
SKO: Also, if the NCAA top brass were to magically disappear from the face of the earth tomorrow, would the world be a better place?
RJ: What's that phrase about "The devil you know..."? I've been thinking about that a lot this election season, and I suppose it applies here. But, short answer: Yeah, I imagine so.
SKO: You've got to put together a squad of 5 dudes (any NBA player past or present) to run against a team of robot Kobe Bryant's, who ya got?
RJ: PG: Magic Johnson
SG: Michael Jordan
SF: LeBron James
PF: Randy Couture (robots are an exception, so I figured I get one, too. Couture > robots).
C: Bill Russell
SKO:Fill in the blank: Eazy_E is to Alex English as Ma$e is to .......
RJ: This one has Tariq written all over it.
Answer: Kobe Bryant. Ha!
SKO: With details if possible, who has been your best interview ever and who has been your worst?
RJ: This is a tough one. For a lot of reasons, NBA guys tend not to be great interviews, and I feel like most of my most memorable interactions from my time at the magazine have NOT been in a formal interview setting: Making fun of Damon Jones' feet in front of his teammates; watching two different Slam writers (not me, in either case) get one-on-one time with Rasheed Wallace after he'd basically told a slew of waiting newspaper guys he wouldn't be talking after a game; sharing a half-full NYC subway car with Steve Nash (after he'd won his second MVP) when no one else on the train recognized him; talking about Radiohead with Tom Gugliotta; hanging out with Mark Cuban in his room at the Ritz in Philly at 3 in the morning after a Mavs-Sixers game — this after Cubes had already picked up the tab for Russ and I and a female who will go unnamed... yeah, interviews are boring. Kobe was a pretty good one. LeBron had his moments. Shawn Marion's cockiness was always welcome. Derek Fisher is one of the nicest dudes ever, from what I know of him. And Morris Peterson — just a cool guy to BS with about whatever.
My most MEMORABLE actual interviews would probably be LeBron as a high school sophomore (just because it was LeBron... as a high school sophomore), OJ Mayo and Bill Walker when they were in high school, and Kobe back in '03. More on that later.
Oh, and Jordan, for Slam 100, just because. It last 13 minutes start to finish, but it was a one-on-one at a time when he pretty much didn't do those anymore. So that was cool. Interesting sidenote: The shoes I wore to that Jordan interview, some relatively hard-to-find seamless AF1s, are now the shoes I wear to mow my lawn. Symbolism, b*tches.
SKO: And who's the one person you'd love to get some time with?
RJ: Bono. There are no basketball players that I haven't spoken with that I care to. That'll be a hugely disappointing answer here. Sorry.
SKO: Any plans for another book?
RJ: No. You're welcome.
SKO: All political affiliations aside, you'd totally do Sarah Palin, right?
RJ: No. I mean, as 44-year-old mothers of five go, she looks pretty good... but she's still a 44-year-old mother of five.
SKO: Finally.....Kobe? There's got to be something you can give us, isn't there?
RJ: Um... I imagine I'm guilty of having overplayed this whole thing to get a rise out of website regulars over the years. There really is no big, interesting story. What happened was a combination of A) my naivete and immaturity with B) his engaging yet possibly psychotic personality; I'm sure he's not really psychotic, but there's SOMETHING going on there...
Anyway, I'm culpable in that, as a life-long, diehard (I thought) Lakers fan early in my days at the magazine, I was maybe a little too willing to give dude the benefit of the doubt where so many others were questioning aspects of his personality. It all started in the spring of 2002, when I went out to L.A. to interview him for a feature. My idea was to talk about how "misunderstood" he was, whatever the f*ck that meant. Anyway, the game I went out for was Pacers @ Lakers in March of '02...
Jog your memory for a second.
That's the night he and Reggie had their little end-of-game brawl at Staples, an incident perhaps best remembered for Austin Croshere's oh-so-sexily torn jersey and Reggie's post-fight comments about "issues," a vague and titillating reference that may not have meant anything, but only added to the sense that he was a dude people couldn't really figure out. Me, I thought I'd figured him out, at least a little. I did more reporting for this story than any other I did while with the mag (pretty much none of which ever saw the light of day), asking a boatload of players and coaches about him, what they thought made him tick, why he caught so much hate for not being "real," etc. Personally, I eventually arrived at an amateur psych analysis, which is that he was this upper-middle-class black kid who grew up in Europe, then came back to the U.S. as a teenager, at the height of hip-hop culture, and was never quite sure where he fit in. Authenticity was ALWAYS a problem for him, and I felt bad for him. I figured he needed a hug.
Anyway, back to the moment: I'm in L.A. hoping to get some one-on-one time with him the day after the game, and now of course he's going to get suspended, and I'm thinking I'm screwed — I won't get any time with him. But he plays ball, gamely shows up at practice to answer questions from the beat writers, and then we get a few minutes face to face. One of the things I brought up right away was how many letters the mag got about him, such a weird mix of love and hate, and basically how our readers — these loyal, involved, die-hard hoop fans — spent so much time trying to figure him out. I don't remember the conversation verbatim, but he was basically like, "Yeah, I read the letters." That led into a broader (though still brief) discussion of perception — that was the key word that kept getting repeated, and would come up again when I finally interviewed him at length six months later — and he was like, "Yeah, I think about that all the time, and you're the first guy who's really asked me about that. I want to talk more about this. I never do this, but here's my number."
Well, he f*cking had me.
I guess I'll never really KNOW if he was being sincere, but in retrospect, I tend to think he wasn't. At the time, though, I was completely wrapped around dude's finger. I believed I was the only basketball journalist alive who UNDERSTOOD this guy, which, even if it were true, would've been a dumb thing for me to get too excited about. It didn't help that we actually traded calls a few times, including HIM calling ME a couple times, unsolicited — once while he was waiting for the team plane to take off, at like 7 in the morning or something — for no other apparent reason than to say what's up. No joke. Think about that: This guy, calling me, just to bullsh*t and say hello. That never came CLOSE to happening with any other player I ever dealt with, and certainly not one on his level (who also happened to play for my favorite team). This only cemented my sense that he was sort of lonely (still seemingly exiled from his own family, aloof with his club-hopping teammates, etc) and, yes, misunderstood, and that he saw me as someone who actually "got" him. Like, you know, I felt his pain.
Or how's this: The Lakers played the Sixers at some point not long after, and for reasons too annoying to get into, I got screwed out of a press credential. Only I didn't find out until I was already on the train from NYC to Philly like four hours before the game. Desperate, I call his cell and leave a message basically saying, "Hey dude, I'm supposed to have a credential but it fell through, I'm on my way to Philly, I'm sure it's a dumb question since this is practically your home town and you must have 100 people to leave tickets for, but any chance you've got one to spare?" Not long after, I get a call back from one of his bodyguards — one of the same dudes he was apparently hanging with in Colorado not long after — saying he was leaving a ticket for me to pick up at will call.
After all this, I was pretty much ready to name my first born after him.
Anyway, that fall we do the interview which became the cover story in Ish... um, I can't remember the number, but the yellow one with him in the black Nike Swingman uni and the trophies lined up in front of him, which remains one of my favorite all-time covers. Anyway, we get back into the whole perspective thing, and I think it ended up being a pretty good Q&A, and that's that. The phone calls mostly cease, but whenever I was at a Laker game in NY or Jersey or wherever, it was always love, big pounds in the lockerroom, etc.
Then Colorado happens. My general take, which I spouted on a couple of brief, stupid appearances on Fox New Channel (!), was that, you never know what could happen, but I really didn't think he was capable of something like that.
Things just got weird from there. Our face-to-face interactions were never anything less than warm and positive, but there was a combination of rumors and work-related encounters that slowly changed my opinion of him. The rumors came from people — sneaker-industry folks we knew and trusted, NBA team PR folks, other players or friends of players — some of whom, it must be said, were affiliated with companies he once endorsed but had since left under less-than-amicable terms. But, still, there were a LOT of stories, and they came from a lot of different people. Stories about him menacing or mistreating assistants, coming up with wack marketing or product ideas, then blaming the company when they weren't well received, just generally being two-faced and a diva. Again, just rumors, but...
The work-related stuff was more of an issue. Basically, we tried to get him for a story post-Colorado, and he understandably wanted to hold off talking to anybody about anything. When we finally did get him, things seemed different. He was offering weird ideas — cover ideas, story concepts — and sort of playing hardball with access. Again, his right to handle all that how he wants. Maybe he's changed by the whole Colorado thing, maybe the people around him (fam? agent?) were pushing him in a different direction. Whatever, it was like pulling teeth trying to get something done. Then we finally DID get something done, only it fell through last second, entirely because of him. There seemed to be a lot of bullsh*t and manipulation going on, which was both professionally and (for me) personally really, really frustrating.
I feel compelled to state that, throughout, whenever I actually SAW the dude, it was friendly and cool and all was well. Always polite and accommodating and professional. But all this other sh*t going on behind the scenes... for a lot of reasons, I'm reluctant to be too specific, and I'm aware that this may sound petty or whatever, but this is how it went down through my eyes, and it really soured me.
Anyway, this played out over the course of a couple years, I guess. Contrary to what some in our little bubble-roofed corner of the world would love to believe, dude never bitch-slapped me or dated my mom or anything. I imagine if I ran into him today, I'd get a smile and a pound. But the combination of things I heard from people I trusted, and then things I dealt with myself, made it hard for me to root for the guy, and, by extension, the team I'd lived for since I was seven years old. Which was a bummer, but I'm over it. Go Cavs!
***To read more of Ryan's work, check the SLAM site and pick up a copy of his book: King James: Believe the Hype---The Lebron James Story
For anyone who follows our site (yes, I can see all 5 of you!), this is a must have. Shoutout to Lang Whitaker over at Slamonline and everyone over at Wizznutzz.com for putting me up on this. Clearly a must have! Check out some of the other great shirts they have as well. 
*********Just because.....I had this piece posted on my old blog last year.....remember, always. Thank you*****************
Written by Eboy
9/11. Two shittier numbers put together may have never been imagined. Since tommorow is the 6th anniversary of that horrible day, I wanted to put my own two cents in about the day, what the towers meant to me and how it has affected me personally.
Growing up in Jersey, I lived in Jersey City, just across the Hudson River from New York City. What seemed like a brave new world on the other side of that grimy body of water was really just a huge stone's throw away for the residents of my town. During the day, facing the east, you could see the Twin Towers ominously in the distance, standing far and above all the other huge buildings surrounding it. At night..... well at night, the towers took on an otherwordly feel. Most of the building's would be dark with stray floors here and there lit up for cleaning crews and maintenance workers. The antenna on the top of Building 1 was lit in three red segments that stood so high in the night sky that sometimes at first glance it would give of the impression that is was an unidentified aircraft of some sort. I can remember countless trips from my grandfathers in Hoboken as a kid, laying in the back seat of my dad's car and seeing the towers out of the passenger side window, lights flickering in the distance, signalling another night ending in the big city. And another ride back to my crappy place in the world.
It's funny, after seeing the towers every day for almost 20 years and then leaving them, seeing them brought down was unbelievably heart-breaking. Never mind the horrors and the tragedy that befell the victims, rescue workers, poilce and fireman on that day and the months that followed, those heroes can never be forgotten. They were so incredibly brave and deserve any goodness that can come their way for their rest of their lives. Seeing those imposing structures come down in a destructive barrage of cement, glass, plaster, dust, dirt and debris was symbolic to how our country took more than black eye that day. We were dealt a concussion blow. Some would say we are still recovering.
Watching that day unfold at home, on a planned day off, seemed almost like I was fated to watch the entire day play out, hour by hour and minute by minute. I was in bed when the first plane struck. I was watching Sportscenter but during a commercial I flicked through the channels and hit CNN. They had that first burning tower image up on the screen and like everyone else, couldn't understand how a pilot could have lost control so bad that he hit the WTC. It had never happened before so what made today so different? The weather looked gorgeous on tv. No rain, no clouds. Nothing. No sooner than I had that thought than the image of another plane taking aim, LIVE, showed on my tv. I was......paralyzed. I knew something was incredibly wrong. I ran out the door and jumped in my car to see my dad about 5 miles from me. He was disabled and at home and I had promised him that I was going to mow his lawn and take him to lunch. My mom was at work. My wife was at work. When I got to my dad's, the buildings were raging with flames and the news people couldn't grasp the situation much like us. Within minutes, the first tower fell. I think my dad and I said in succession, "what the fuck is going on?" We started panicking. Is this the end of the world? Are we at war? In our own country? Symbolically, I ran out of my parent's front door and standing in the corner of their front yard was a United States flag that I had just taken down a week or so earlier which had gotten twisted in a rash of heavy storms that moved through our area. It just seemed like it HAD to be back up, waving proudly in the warm September Florida air. By the end of the day, we had touched base with most of our families in Jersey and New York and we started to have the events of the day sink in beyond the shock and disgust of the initial acts themselves. We knew the day was going to be forever remembered. And it was horrible to think of the reason that it would.
I made my way back to "Ground Zero" in June of 2002 and seeing the memorials, the barren buildings footprints and the sense of despair that still surrounded that area left me with a feeling of sadness that could never be taken away. I donated money, my wife created handmade pins that she sold for a minimal cost and we donated the take from the sales to the victims. We wanted to do something, and we did, but it just didn't seem like it made a difference. But the more I thought about it, the more it seemed to me that there were thousands of others doing the same and that it WOULD make a difference to someone. A lot of our country has put this date and it's actions in a far corner of their minds because it didn't affect them directly. That is so wrong on so many levels, but our country and it's people have a way of downplaying even the worst acts because it's just too much of a bother to try and relieve or rehash something that can't be wrapped up in a nice, neat half an hour package. It's shameful. But it's the truth. 
So to commerate the day, on it's sixth anniversary, I wanted to express my deepest thanks to the brave men and women fighting the war in Iraq for whatever reason they are there for. Every person that lent a hand, a dollar or a minute of their time during that bleak hour in our history, they deserve our recognition. I had an image of the Trade Centers tattoed on my back in October '01. It will never allow me to forget that day, even for a minute. My aunt, who worked for Cantor Fitzgerald in Tower 2, lost her job and her way of life and luckily on that day was able to keep her OWN life because her daughter was sick and she needed to stay home with her. A twist of fate never forgotten. I have a small statue of the towers on my desk at work and a beautiful, one of a kind painting in my family room of the towers at night at home. I didn't lose anyone in particular like so many other's did that day. But I attached myself to the towers and it's a way to always see them in all their glory. I will never forget. The horrors of the day, the victims in all three locations, the resurgence of our people, the bonding of our communities and the love and compassion shown to all those involved in the rescue effort. And most of all, I'll never forget those two metal masterpieces. Steel and mortar can always be rebuilt. But memories are hard to erase. And mine are still there all the time.
Always remember, 9/11/01.
In an effort to kill time and space and surely spark conversation amongst the masses, I wish to enlighten everyone with a list of my 10 favorite females at the moment. This was spurned on by a wild dream I had and an even wilder imagination that I possess. I tend to have an overall preference that I’m sure you will see, but there should be at least one person on the list that everyone can be in agreement with me on (with apologies to our sister of the group, Ms. Cheryl, who is beautiful BTW)
Without further rambling:
Meagan Good: Anyone that knows me even a little bit knows that Meagan is my Roni girl (shout out to Bobby B.) No explanation needed. 
Halle Berry: Baby or no baby, Halle is timeless. If this was the VH1 Hip-Hop Awards, she would be the one receiving the Lifetime Achievement Award. 
Erin Andrews: Being a basketball and just overall sports junkie that I am, I get continuously bombarded with Erin’s presence. I’m not complaining, at all. 
Nicole Scherzinger: Better known to the masses as the lead singer of the Pussycat Dolls. Her music sucks and I could care less.
Megan Fox: I have yet to see Transformers (I know, I know), but any girl who utters these words is good in my book: “I really enjoy having sex,” says this 22-year-old Transformers temptress. “I’m young and have a lot of hormones. I’m always in the mood.”
Gabrielle Union: Ms. Union used to be my #1 back in the day, and I feel she will always have a place on my list. A raise of hands for anyone who can’t forget the strip scene in the forgettable DMX movie “Cradle 2 The Grave”. (Raises hand high)
Sanaa Lathan: “Love and Basketball” and “The Best Man” are 2 of my favorite movies, ever. A timeless beauty. 
Eva Mendes: If I could die and come back as any body part in the world, I would want to be the mole on Eva’s face. Wait, that is a body part, right?
Alicia Keys: Some people say she has a big forehead. Well you know what? So do I. So f*ck it, this is my baby. 
Candace Parker: I did mention that I love basketball, right? Well, I love Candace as well. As a bonus: our kids should have enough in their genes to make it to the NBA. Win!
Will you know your 15 minutes of fame when it comes? For Kansas City Chiefs safety Bernard Pollard, that time is upon him. A little known player from Purdue University, the 3rd year of his career will no doubt go down in the NFL history books as possibly his most known season. Unfortunately, he won’t be known for his spectacular play as he will for the “Hit Heard Around The League” on New England Patriots QB and all everything man Tom Brady. A hit Randy Moss has already termed “dirty”. Welcome to the Matt Cassell Era, Patriots fans.
Just last season the Patriots were the scrounge of the league for Spygate and the subsequent findings, fines, and suspensions. The Patriots soldiered on thru the season thumbing their noses at all who called the cheaters and bullies and beat all comers and even were accused of running up the score on teams. They and their fans had a swagger about them that turned off anybody outside of the Boston sporting area. It was already bad enough that the Red Sox were reigning World Series champs and the Celtics had just acquired Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen for 30 cents on the dollar, but now they were cheaters? Hate is not a strong enough word for the heat that was being stared straight thru the Boston common area.
Perseverance and a few lucky calls carried the Patriots thru an undefeated season and playoffs, and straight to the Superbowl against the New York Giants. All that were not either a faithful fan or family of New England quickly became fans of the gap-toothed Michael Strahan and the choir-boy-looking Eli Manning. David Tyree was the first sign that karma was on the comeback trail. The final score reinforced a complete 180 for the good of mankind. However, the Football Gods were clearly not done.
It is always funny and ironic how payback seems to always find the right time to spring from the bushes and surprise an unsuspecting foe. Payback waited until the 1st quarter of the first game against an inferior opponent to show its hand. It enlisted an little known overachiever to add insult to injury. The final result is Tom Brady-Bündchen has suffered a season ending ACL tear in his knee and NFL fans everywhere are cheering the hopes their team has now acquired of actually being able to compete for an NFL Championship with the Bully on the Block now kicked to the gutter. How ironic indeed.
From my perch at the sports bar and the subsequent cheering at the moment karma completed its comeback, I can confirm the b*tch does not kiss first.
(Things that are keeping me going until the NBA season tips off)
Like my colleagues, I felt compelled to drop some knowledge on what keeps my mind and body busy until my first love comes home to me. Also, work is slow and I’m still not recovered from my holiday weekend 3-day drinking binge. My baby comes home October 28th!
1) Yes We Can!
I am in no way a political aficionado, but Barack Obama has seized my attention and sparked a fire in my soul. I don’t know if he will make actual change or if he is spitting the regular political rhetoric, but he seems genuine enough. I have actually met his running mate Joe Biden being that I am a former resident of the tiny state of Delaware and know that this man has a good character.
I know what I will be doing November 4th, what will you be doing?
2) 2008 Olympics
Specifically, the Redeem Team. The gold is back where it belongs. However, there was so much more to these Olympics than Kobe, LeBron, and the re-emergence of Dwyane Wade. Michael Phelps, Usain Bolt, the USA men’s volleyball team, Lisa Leslie’s fourth gold medal, China’s domination in gold medal’s count, the USA women’s beach volleyball team extending their winning streak to 109 matches, the great show put on by the host country China, etc. Yes, I was watching.
3) Summer Ball
What is the best way to get over the blues of the NBA off season? How about actually picking up a ball and playing! After breaking my foot last summer and effectively ruining my regular ball sessions for almost 10 months, I’m back in the swing of pounding the blacktop (or the rec center floor). Got game?
4) The Rich Rod Era
Anyone who knows me knows where my loyalties lie. One of my most fiercest loyalties is Michigan Football. The Rich Rodriguez Era has gotten of to a slow start, but in time we shall have the right recruits for the spread offense. The days of 3 yards and a cloud of dust are gone. Go Blue!
5) Fish Tacos
Living in Virginia Beach for the last 6 years, I have gotten acquainted with different things I had never been introduced too. One of those things happens to be fish tacos from a place called Baja Cantina on 23rd street at the ocean front. If you are ever in the area, this is a must have.
6) Margarita’s and The Ocean Breeze
Just another luxury of living at the beach in the summer time. It is also fun to make fun of fat people in swim trunks and bathing suits while drunk.
7) Fantasy Football
Yeah, f*ck it, I’m a nerd. And a loser. Sue me.
********Disclaimer********This isn't a popularity contest so I really don't care how the comments sound after you read this. Thanks for your support.
Written by Eboy
So I've been flying high since the "late night Saturday/early morning Sunday American time vampiristic live telecast" of the Unites States/Spain gold medal basketball game. The game that the much ballyhooed Redeem Team proved themselves in as being able to deal with slight adversity and closing out what most expected them to do. I was one of the people that caught the exhibition games, the prelim matches and then the important games the Olympics require. In actuality, the US squad should have just had a 2 game bye to the gold medal game, but you know, rules are rules. While I thoroughly enjoyed almost all of the players contributions to the collective prize American basketball fans have been waiting on, the things that caught my attention in these games were, in no particular order:
A) LEBRON JAMES
Lebron James is ridiculous. Simply remarkable. I know most people that are under the age of 30 really can't comprehend the history of the NBA before 1990, but believe me, Lebron is like nothing seen before. His strength is in the highest ranks of great power forwards in the history of the game. His athleticism is on par with super freaks like Shawn Kemp & Josh Smith, except Lebrons game is 10 times more well-rounded than either of those guys. His ability to be unstoppable on the offensive end is in the same class as guys like Jordan & Barkley, putting their heads down, taking and giving punishment and taking points, just not getting them. His passing is not quite at the level of Magic Johnson, but there is an eerie feel of sameness when he is in the open court with guys running with him that he can make THAT pass. And due to these Olympic games, the feeling of him being a hyped up defender is right there on the table. If he gets that part of his game in check, forget it. There may be new record books that are needed for dudes accomplishments. To anyone who can't comprehend it, this is the guy EVERYONE in the league is fearing. No one else is close. You can hate the guy all you want for speaking about his off the court endeavors but there is no way you can dispute the continued progression of the prototype player of the 21st century. One thing is clear, Lebron James is good at basketball.
B) THE MAMBA'S LUCKY STRIKE
Kobe Bryant changed nothing in my mind as to his place in the game. A truly gifted scorer, legendary in it's completeness, a fierce competitor, a proven winner and truly overrated at this point of his career. Yes I know I'm famously known as a Kobe basher, but hear me out. Kobe has had three phases of his career. The Young'n phase were he suffered through trying times with the Lakers including most famously his wide open failure in the Utah Jazz series when he struggled to close the deal on several occasions in the most heated of circumstances. The dude was talented and cocksure, but not ready for that type of pressure. His age was the big factor at that point. But he had that promise.
The second phase was his title years and should be known as his Legacy years. Teamed with an elite Shaq, a really fantastic set of teammates and the coach who molded Michael into the ultimate winner, Kobe's fire shown brightest in that phase. He became a hero and matinee idol and gained fans worldwide. He became a multiple champion and began to garner mentions in the same group of players that most basketball historians hold in the highest regard. It was well deserved at that time. No question.
This current phase would have to be deemed the Failure phase. From his much publicized and criticized off the court troubles to his continued basketball failings since the departure of Shaquille and the reforming of the current Lakers squad, there has never been a player who has failed so often (on the court and off) who gets so much leeway because of his past accomplishments. Guess what? It's going on six seasons that Kobe has done nothing resembling the winning ways he became known for. Kobe has gone in reverse as to the career paths most great winners usually follow. Lose early on, win in the prime of your career and then fade away into the sunrise. Magic, Larry, Michael, Hakeem, Shaq, these legends have done this in some form or another. Kobe has done something opposite of that. Not a bad thing, just odd. These Olympic games did nothing to change that perception of him though. His 4 minutes of fantastic play in the 4th quarter of the gold medal game didn't erase what basically amounted to simply mediocre international play from the so called "best player on the planet" and until he can right the Lakers ship and do what is expected of him (winning titles), those free passes should be held for someone more deserving.....someone who is back on the rise up........someone like.... 
C) DWYANE WADE !!!!!
Fine, I'm being slightly ridiculous, and yes, I am a homer, but I've waited a long time to give the dude some actual good words compared to the things I've been saying for most of the last two seasons and now seems like the time for it.
Dwyane's performance in the Beijing games was bordering on awe inspiring. Awe inspiring because no one knew or expected what he has going to bring to the table. I'm not saying it as a fan of his, but the American media and the large majority of fans from SLAM, local supporters in South Florida and on webboards on the "Worldwide Leaders" website, among others, seemed to bear out the same, shocked result. Dwyane Wa.....D-Wade, Flash, was back. Take one guy off the Olympic squad that would have given the US the largest handicap? It was Dwyane. Hands down. Try not to forget that almost every game (except Angola) had a close first period score that seemed to jump incredulously once D-Wade came off the bench. Odd huh? No, actually, not really. It was a forced move due to the perceived slight it would have been to ask Kobe to come off the bench, but anyone with a sliver of common sense knows that it should have been the Mamba as the Miracle to D-Wade's Smokey in this tournament.
Dwyanes determination to silence the critics and his desire to prove himself on the world stage was motivation enough that made his "benching" each game the fuel to his fire. His athleticism was off the charts, his speed was on par with....well no one else was close in the Olympic tournament except possibly Pat Mills from Australia or Jamaican wonderman Usain Bolt and his attitude showed his swagger to have returned full force. This is great news for the fans of Miami Heat basketball. Sure they won't be winning a title anytime soon, but there is hope again that the Dwyane Wade that rocked the basketball world in 2006 will again be driving into foreign paints starting this October and actually make the Heat a respectable foe to great teams and not so good ones that they struggled with last season. If Lebron and Kobe are now 1a and 1b in greatest player ranking in the current NBA landscape, Dwyane has positioned himself to be on the outer fringes of the conversation again, like he was in 2006, and the results he shows this coming season will be looked at under a microscope due to his excellent work in China. 
Lastly, I think the thing that shot out at me the most that really was unexpected was the tremendous play of Toronto Raptor F/C Chris Bosh. Dude proved a ton to me, and I know millions of others during the Olympics. He was clearly the best big on the squad and his passion was something most fans don't normally see on the networks due to Lebron, Kobe and San Antonio overload. I know there have been whispers in the Miami media that Riles is planning on making a strong play for Chris to pair up with Dwyane in Miami in 2010, and if this tournament was any indication of what the two of them might be able to do together...well damn, bring him on.
In closing, I'm glad the games are over, I loved watching the team as a unit accomplish the goal/gold and look forward to another great season of NBA ball. This was a summer of redemption for this group but for United States fans, this was where we NEEDED to be, back on top, by hook or by crook. Hey, it's the American way!
Five hundred killa bees, buzzin' and really on it
Whipped with CUBAN LINX, cut with LIQUID SWORDS
Choked by IRONMEN 'til we crush your vocal cords.
You ain't nothin' but a pig in a blanket
Hoghead, the deadliest food at the banquet.
All this rap crap that's trapped in your colon
Only means, get rid of the wack sh-- ya holdin'
Some people call him the next Hunter S.Thompson,some people call him the definitive voice of Generation X.Well we just call him the guy who shockingly agreed to answer a few questions for us.Although mainly a music and pop culture critic by trade(you can find his work in the pages of Esquire and GQ,among others),you'd be hard pressed to find a writer with better Hoops knowledge than Chuck.In his books he has devoted whole chapters to Steve Nash before he was a two time MVP and NBA Officiating.His latest book and debut novel Downtown Owl is available from September 16th.
SKO:In the NBA,there's a commonly held view,that almost paradoxically,the general talent pool of the NBA has been diluted but there has never been so many transcendant stars.Do you buy this and if so,why do you think that is?
CK:This is true. And while it does seem paradoxical, it actually makes sense. The reason is expansion. Look at it like this: Let's say the NBA had only 20 franchises. This would mean that the league would only have 240 players, so every team would be much better. The worst player on the worst team would be the equivalent of a role player on an average team today. More importantly, the 21st best player in the entire league would (quite possibly) only be the 2nd best player on his own team, assuming the talent was distributed equally across those 20 franchises. In other words, a guy like Elton Brand would be a very good team's second option. A guy like Joe Johnson would be a second or third option. A guy like Drew Gooden might be coming off the bench. So all the teams would be more complete and more dangerous. Practices would be more competitive, so young teams would improve at a faster rate. The league would be better overall.
The reason the NBA seems to have so many transcendent players right now is a product of necessity -- because they league is watered down, the best players have to do more. In 1985, James Worthy was the third-best player for the Lakers. He averaged something like 17 points a game, but he still deferred to Magic and Kareem. That would never happen in this era. Now, Worthy would become a free agent, jump to Memphis or Minnesota, and score 30 a night. We would all classify him as a transcendent superstar. But the consequence is that there are no transcendent role players anymore, and those are the guys who make a league great.
SKO:Which impending event transpires first: A- An expansion NBA team pops up in Chisinau, Moldova; Or B- An NBA team relocates to Vermont and renames itself the "Vermont Verizon Wireless"?
CK:I would say "B." I wouldn't even mind if that happened. The one thing I like about Europeon soccer is that all the teams are whored out to every advertiser, which allows the networks to broadcast games without commercial interruptions. For TV audiences, corporate sponsorship can actually be a benefit.
SKO:What,in your opinion,would be more beneficial to the NBA,the NBA abolishing the Age Limit,more players cutting their teeth for a few years in Europe or the immediate resignation of David Stern?
CK:This is a good question. I think it is finally time for people to admit that Stern has been a bad commissioner for the NBA. There was a point (early in his tenure) when everyone in the media was saying stuff like, "Stern is a genius. He's the basketball equivalent of Pete Rozelle." So many people said this that Stern actually came to believe them. He now seems to think all his decisions are right, simply because he is the man who makes them. The NBA has some authentic problems right now, and most can be traced back to Stern. Expansion has hurt the league substanically. His unwillingness to overrule a bad league regulation during the Suns-Spurs playoff series in 2007 was terrible management. The fact that Stern has been so adamant about making basketball a global sport is going to become a real quagmire -- it's only a matter of time before some team in Italy DOES offer Kobe Bryant $50 million to jump to Europe, and that would be a disaster. And this gambling situation is *so much worse* than anything happening in the NFL or MLB ... the idea of refs fixing games is much more disturbing that SpyGate or steroids, because nothing destroys the integrity of any league as much as gambling. It's time we just admit that David Stern has become a bad commissioner. His singular skill is public relations. He has hurt basketball in this country.
SKO:Pitch a geographically appropriate name for the new Oklahoma City NBA team that also fits the teams status in the NBA.
CK:The Oklahoma City Citizens
SKO:How deflating is it to realize that the difference between McCain and Obama, especially in terms of foreign policy, is like the difference between a Double Whopper with Cheese and a Double Whopper with Cheese (extra pickles)?
CK:Well, this is complicated. In every political race, there is a "perceived difference" and an "actual difference" between any two candidates. In 2000, the perceived difference between Gore and Bush was virtually nonexistent -- however, time has shown that the actual difference was substantial. Right now, the perceived difference between Obama and McCain is unspeakably vast, but the actual difference is relatively small. But that still matters. Because America is a country with an inordinately high percentage of uninformed people, perception generally matters more than reality. In other words, the fact that people *think* Obama represents a new kind of political culture is probably more important than whatever policies he would (or wouldn't) enact. Culture beats strategy every time.
"You just say you're out there waiting
for the miracle, for the miracle to come."
Sometimes things just aren't meant to be.No people currently with-pulse know this to be true more than Lakers fans.Rewinding things back to the start of the season makes for some interesting thinking and discoveries.Well they're maybe not discoveries so much as they are realizations.If you put yourself into Laker fan mode[TM]for a minute [and I don't mean that to mean thinking things like 'I can't fucking believe I missed George Clooney and Judd Apatow hanging out at the Ivy the other day' and 'Tanning should be tax-free' by the way] and set your mind back to October 31st,you realize a few things about this past season.You'll realize that after a summer of insane and inane trade speculation sparked by your best player things might not go so well this season and maybe things in LA are about to change drastically.It is entirely possible that you might get to thinking that this guy is not all he's cracked up to be,after all,why would he insist on having the team to himself and then start complaining that the team isn't good enough when he got his wish?Why was he requesting things he knew he couldn't have?Why would he criticize the team's brightest talent?Was it a sign of him wanting out or maybe a contrived way of showing his leadership 'technique',as if it's him saying:'Sure I'll I'm free from the Lakers for the summer and sure I'll be playing with the best for the US,but I'm still the leader of this team and Bynum,you better bring it next year!',maybe just another poor Money parody,this is of course pure speculation and is now very irrelevant so we'll move on.Maybe you start to think that all this thinking is hopeless and maybe he won't be a Laker much longer anyway.He gets moved before trade deadline and the Lakers get a new start,not like that fake new start like after Shaq left,I mean a real new start-a-wipe-the-slate-clean-and-start-actively-scouting-Ricky Rubio new start.A win-less hope driven new start that will be as depressing as it would be exciting,as exhausting as it would be worthwile,a most appropriate style of new start for a city wherein hope is born and killed simultaneosly,dreams shattered and realized in the blink of an eye,just look at the Clippers.
This maudlin thinking may have gotten you down,so you prefer to deal with the guaranteed's,the here and nows,the things we know we have instead of dreaming up plausible yet unlikely doomsday scenarios.So,the deal is(my storytelling isn't great so remember,we're still in October 31st,2007),Bean is still in LA and the Lakers have a second round of the playoffs if they play their cards right type of team.Things could be worse.I mean it's not like your the Clippers with little hope and a team who's star player is fittingly injured for the season,a succinct yet cruel commentary on the organization's place in basketball,with one perrennial all star and one mould breaking point guard with a sky high ceiling,and they can use neither.You take little solace when thinking about this however,after all the Clippers are not the Lakers,the Clippers never had a point guard playing center and winning a finals game,they have never had teams with their own names.The 'Showtime Clippers' have never and will never exist,ditto for 'Clipshow'.The Clippers are very much the seedy under-belly of LA,representing everything that can and does go wrong in the town.The Clippers are the Porn Industry,the B Movies while the Lakers represent the glitz,the red carpets and the award shows.The Clippers are the 29 year old actor from North Dakota,who decided to give Hollywood a shot and ends up with nothing more than a few bit roles in indie movies,a slew waitering jobs and a heroin habit.A victim of following his own dreams.Conversely the Lakers are the celebs the whole world are interested in,regardless of talent or ability.A raper of good fortune and social status(most likely a republican).Not that the plight of the Clippers will ever bother the Lakers fan and why should it?The Lakers fan has its own team in turmoil to worry about.The important thing for this Lakers team and perhaps its one saving grace will be the development of some of their up and comers,most notably Andrew Bynum,maybe winning's a lost cause this season but not out of the question next season.If development is accompanied by some savvy off-season moves-that is.By now,your thinking in Laker fan mode has probably made you come to the realizations that a)an immediate ring is completely out of the question and b)that the upcoming season with all it's variables and lack of real Lakers history relevance might not be so fun.You'd be forgiven for thinking the only thing that could make this a real worthwhile year for the Lakers as an organisation(This clearly means a 'chip) and for you as a fan(see last bracketed sentence) of an historic organization would be a minor miracle.
If you thought that,you were both wrong and right at the same time.
Fast forward to Tuesday June 17th,2008 .The same feelings lie within the Lakers faithful,disappointment,serious questions about the team and very unsure about the future.The feelings are not so different to those felt at the end of October,but are more visceral,they cut deeper,though the feelings are the same,the circumstances couldn't be anymore different if one was represent by GeorgeW.Bush and the other by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.You see,you got your miracle and what good did it do?Sure you may have rid the crest of a wave for about three months,the Lakers temporarily became box-office again,people were even talking about dynasties.What I'm asking(only half in jest) is would the Lakers have been better off in the long run without the Gasol trade?The first and almost reflexive answer would be a resounding no.But I think there might be something to this thought,call it reactionary or contraryist all you want but maybe the Lakers might have been better off rebuilding naturally rather than having to deal with the expectations that come with a block busting trade,maybe their finals fall was because of the weight of expectations,maybe they crumbled because of it.It could also be argued that their meteoric rise post Gasol trade could be attributed to how the players responded to the expectations,it is entirely possible they used the new found interest and hope held by the fans for good and as a catylist for wins,over performing their way to the finals and eventually being found out by the better team.But whatever your take on it is,the facts are that the fans were made subject to dissapointments the likes of which they could only dream about at the beggining of the season.I'm still not quite sure whether that's a bad or a good thing,in sports,I find,the lows are always lower than the highs are high,something,as a fan you come to know and come to get sick of.Who reading has never questioned their interest in sport?Who after a crushing defeat hasn't screamed to themselves 'Fuck you sports,you evil fucking pig dog!You've taken all I've got you filthy swine.I give up,I fucking give up'.If you say you've never done this,then you're a better person than I am.You'd no doubt expect these feelings to be the feelings of the Lakers faithful,you could see why but would you feel any sympathy?The same Lakers fans screaming 'dynasty' prematurily,the same Lakers fans who seemed to have at least quadrupled magically since the trade,something you'll only see the next time the Lakers start winning big.
Me being somewhat of a basketball atheist(with one exception),I usually don't care much about the outcome of a series or a finals as long as the basketball is worth watching-I'm happy.I will sometimes take an interest in certain players that I find intruiging or likeable or whatever.But I never root for one team over another-not in basketball.So,what made these last finals so different?I mean both teams have intruiging players and sub-plots,both have a likeable story.I have nothing against a single player on either team,not even Bean.Odom has long been one of my favorites,ditto KG.So,in theory I should have been laying back and enjoying what was to come with no bias.This wasn't the case,I was biased,very biased.I wanted the Lakers to lose,very much,it wasn't even a case of wanting the Celtics to win,I wanted the Lakers to win.I was confused at the time and I now know why.To put it simply it was the fans,but it wasn't just the fans.Sports and especially teams like the Lakers always fall the merry victim to the bandwagoner,I'm sure the population of Lakers fans swelled during the Showtime Lakers and Lakeshow era and that made sense,it was understandable,it wasn't even a bad thing.These teams had massive public appeal,celebrities that people loves supported the Showtime Lakers.James Worthy would grab a rebound,fling an outlet,run up the court-on the way having sex with at least 3 of LA's finest actresses and still end up finishing the break with a smooth dunk.LA equals celebrity and could you blame people wanting to be an indirect peer to those they respected and admire?The same goes for the Lakeshow era Lakers,they represented celebrity and evevrything most people wanted to be,such was the perception of celebrity back then.But,even since the Lakeshow era,things have changed,celebrity has changed.People are more interested in watching and laughing at the demise of celebrities.The same celebrities who were once lauded and loved by many seemed to outstay their welcome,people may not have been enamoured by these stars constant and very public displays of gaudy wealth and superiority.So,somewhere between one Lakers era and another peoples perception of what the Lakers stand for.For some it's the awesome place where the girls from the Hills live,to others it's the mildly disgusting place where people with little talent and bare vaginas get more exposure and interest than stories of actual importance.I'm very much in the second camp,along with many others.Though as shown by the volume of new Lakers fans that were recently exposed,the first phrase is not without it's supporters.Both sides are polar opposites and cannot peacefully co-exist,thus my recent anti Lakers agenda.In short,as long the Celebutard movement is still alive and well,I will be rooting against LA.It may seem meaningless and unrelated,but it's not.....but it is.
So the Lakers have a cloudy yet bright future after a spectcular yet depressing season.Confused yet?
Be careful what you wish for.
by Eboy
Since our namesake is on the verge of an international comeback and is back in the public eye, why not take in some of best moments and celebrate the killer that was Kemp.
Eboy
My legions of fans are fully aware that I'm writing a novel, one version of which is in English. Of course, I'm sure it'll end up on Oprah's Book Club and everything, but writing, and especially re-writing, can be tedious. Naturally, I manage to waste a lot of time; procrastination is an important part of the creative process. So, to celebrate the completion of Part 1 of my book, I thought I'd let myself be inspired by Eboy's list of things that have helped him endure the summer and come up with my own list of diversions, things that help me avoid writing: