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Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Draft Mockery Pt.1-No Surprises,Please.-Top 5

Posted by TADOne

In truth,there is no number 2 pick here.There is no conceivable way either GM could screw this up,I have no doubt that both will do their utmost to sabotage this easy choice,but let's not get too cynical here.

Since the Miami Heat tried so hard to play a brand of soul destroying-ly bad basketball all to attain the number one pick,which up until the end of March Madness WAS Mike Beasley,I find it very fitting and,indeed,satisfying to see the Miami Heat with the number 2 pick, still able to choose the object of their season long affections,but it turns out they've changed their mind,and are now even threatening to draft OJ Mayo.It's like,when at a party,it's made abundantly clear that a girl wants you,but you only have eyes for her friend.Will this end in a drunken-porch-side argument?Probably not,but still.There was very little debate all year about who would be the number one pick,it was assumed that whoever would intentionally suck enough to grab the number one would pick Beasley.He was too exciting and intriguing for this not to be the case.If only it were now that simple.The combination of Roses' ridiculous crunch-time play and Chicago getting the number one blew the lid off the whole plan.

Now,the roles are reversed.Rose is the almost guaranteed first pick and the buzz surrounding Beasley seems to be fading.People are more interested in engaging in inane arguments about his height or in highlighting character problems which haven't been a factor since he left high school.Rose has been on the good side of people's short sightedness and gold fish like memory,whereas Beasley has been a victim of tired Prep-star stereotypes and people's unwillingness to accept someone's ability to change.It seems that people are basing their argument on Roses' case for number 1 solely because of his performance in March.Now,don't get me wrong here,these types of big performances are a crucial factor on teams deciding who they'll draft,but its not THE factor that needs to be taken
into account.Rose should not be drafted first just because he was the last of the big prospects we saw play.

But he should be the number one pick,the Bulls need him a lot more than he needs the Bulls and a whole lot more than Miami need him.Chicago's current batch of young,solid yet unspectacular Bulls-and Tyrus Thomas simply isn't working.That wasn't a revolutionary sentence.Many of Chicago's problems last year stemmed from the point guard position as a whole being completely devoid of any creativity.Kirk Hinrich and Chris Duhon's style of dribble-dribble pass play won't cut it in a team with any type of ambition to win.Chicago do need some interior presence,but having a strong athletic playmaker to which you can build a promising ,young, athletic team around trumps any frontcourt need.With Rose,the Bulls could be a winning team next year and even make and appearance in the playoffs,with Beasley-not so much.Everything is pretty much set in stone,all the GMs have to do is the obvious thing,the thing that every media outlet and mock draft to date says they should.GMs don't have a history of being particularly creative people,so they shouldn't start now.With Rose at 1 and Beasley at 2 everything is OK with the world and the NBA is the better for it.Chicago starts on the road to relevancy and Miami is at the very least an entertaining team to watch.

My anthem for this draft is No Surprises by Radiohead because that's exactly what we want,within the first two picks anyway..

Number 1-Chicago Bulls-Derrick Rose-Memphis

As stated above,the Bulls need a point guard not named Kirk Hinrich,Rose happens to be a pretty good one.He'll probably be the most athletic point guard in the Lig right away and will bring some immediate impact.Can do pretty much everything on the floor,excellent passer,rebounder,ball handler.Can finish like few others can.Do we get the picture yet?He's pretty great and great to watch and I hope to God he makes the Bulls and maybe even by extension the Eastern Conference relevant/worth watching.And I'm not sure if the NBA has ever been this lucky with the amount of young,quality point guards coming to the fore in such a small space of time(if this has happened before,please let me know-I'm young).Maybe I'm getting a little too excited about him before he's even played a minute in the L,but all I'll say is that I'm looking forward to him having battle with the like of Chris Paul and Deron Williams in the not-so-distant future.

Number 2-Miami Heat-Michael Beasley-Kansas State.

Again,a freakish athlete,does very little wrong,has a good inside-outside game.Uses the triple threat position as it was meant to be used,his jab steps are hugely efficient.Has a variety of spin moves and fadeaways and a very solid all around game.Is a tireless rebounder and manages to grab rebounds he has no right to.Is a stat stuffer-can put up ridiculous numbers consistently.This pick will work for the Heat on so many levels.The first is not having the problem of Rose and Wade competing for the volume of on ball time that both need to be effective.The second is that this clears the way for them to either use Shawn Marion at the 4 or ideally-get rid of him altogether.At first,it probably won't be pretty but I'm confident that he'll get comfortable and average in and around 17-20 PPG.

Number 3-Timberwolves-Brook Lopez-Stanford

Let me start off by saying that this is not what I think should happen,only what I think will happen.If you mosey on over to the T'Wolves website,you'll see that Lopez is adorning the top three stories on the front page.They seem to want him-a lot.You can see why,they already have their off guard,a rising star power forward and with no other point guard worth taking at three in the draft,why not go for the semi safe center option?Brook will at least be a 12 and 7 career guy.I wouldn't take him but wouldn't be mad if the Wolves decided not to go for one of the many alluring yet risky 'tweener guards lurking around the lottery.

Number 4-Seattle Supersonics(?)-OJ Mayo-USC

Unless Miami go absolutely crazy and draft him as has been threatened,the Sonics will take the best player available on the board.Though this may only be used as trade bait for an older,more experienced veteran that is badly needed on this team of 14 year olds.Mayo will be good,there is very little debate with this.He won't be a perennial all star,but will be at least a 20 point per game scorer on most teams.

Number 5-Memphis Grizzlies-Eric Gordon-Indiana

For the past few weeks,it almost seemed that Kevin Love was a mortal lock for the number 5,but there have been indications of late that Memphis might want to orchastrate a trade involving David Lee and Brian Cardinal's expiring contract out of this pick and an uber athletic shooting guard will be eons more attractive on the trading block than Kevin Love.This pick could also easily be Russell Westbrook or Jarryd Bayless but the Griz seem set on Gordon.

Check back tomorrow for more draft related wrongness.

Done by: AR


TADOne said...

Just to avoid any confusion, this was done by our one and only college expert AR, but I had to re-post it so that it got the maximum exposure it should get. Great work, AR!

Tariq al Hayder said...

What is this "draft" you speak of?

Tim, I've got a GZA article in the pipeline. Keep your eyes peeled!

I don't know anything about anything when it comes to college ball, but I imagine this is good work, Alan. Kudos!

TADOne said...

Tariq: I actually already saw it saved as a 'draft'. I'm good like that.

DP said...

nice guys. now click on my name and check out my draft preview. we taking ova. one website at a time.

AR said...

Ah yes,I was trying to post this for damn near an hour but Blogger was just being an asshole,thanks TAD.
NOTE:I'm totally willing to admit I'm wrong about the #3 pick

Hursty said...

you do realise that pic of Beasley says - 'not for public use' or something like that?

TADOne said...

I guess it would matter if the 'public' actually viewed our blog....

BETCATS said...

whats good ladies, and Tariq/dp/hursty. Mock drafts are just things fantasy basketballers like Rick Kamela use to achive sexu@l plesure. Its either that or arson, so i am glad they made the right choice. But other than that they are pointless. I updated my site, and if anybody wants to read it go to

Tariq al Hayder said...


How's Queen Mab?

TADOne said...

Where the hell is part 2 AR?!

Hursty said...

S.K.O is slipping, come on fellas, lets see what you got :)

TADOne said...

It's called real-life and work, Hursty. But don't worry, we'll be coming with something soon enough.

Tariq al Hayder said...


I should have mentioned this befor, but "soul-destroyingly" is a sweet adverb.

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